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The Ideal family

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                Throughout my preteens all those years ago I came to the conclusion that my family was highly dysfunctional. In those moments I decided to dedicate a percentage of my goals in this life to the comprehension of what a near perfect family would look like, and how to provide a better life for my kids. How would it function as a unit? Would there be unforeseeable weakness inevitability? Join me on this adventure as I look through a short variety of family types and what kind of people they produce.

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                First though, let’s talk about children and their strengths and weaknesses. Kids are innocent, impressionable, vulnerable, sensitive, but they are also un-corrupt, the future, a part of you. If you have a history of hurting yourself, then chances are you will have a history of hurting them. Your weakness becomes theirs and your leadership will dictate how they react to authority. In addition to this, it’s a mathematical certainty that each generation grows on the intellect of the prior. I have always thought it to be essential to a child’s development that you treat them with greater maturity than they currently posses. I will not waste my time talking to a baby in those little baby voices, my baby comes out and I will talk a simple gentle to them. Anything the child sees or hears will influence their cognitive development, so why slow a child down with signals in the wrong direction.

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                Let’s start with a party family, also known as the baby momma family, and or the carefree family. I have known many families that have generations of women who each have a kid or two prior to 25, sometimes even 20. This in addition to behavior like partying with your kids as they reach their teens is a key indicator you may be from this type of family. I have seen many of these families, they are usually very kind but you could ask if they lack disciple, and leadership. They often do, but not always. They are tight netted, allowing for love to bloom even in questionable places. None the less I would consider these families to be the envy of some. What is this family’s weakness? A limitation on success and expectations of one’s self and others among the group is common among families who love and smile without as much concern for the less desirable subjects in life. 

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                What about a PG love family, these families are similar to the one above with one key difference. They prefer PG entertainment to the rolling of blunts and lighting of Sambuca shots for their son’s 15 year old birthday. Usually these families stay together when it comes to making meals, going on vacation and growing into adults. These are fantastic situations, however like a gene pool, social groups do offer strengths when properly diversified and weakness when not. This can lead to overly sheltering relations, or over baring parents. Have you seen the chick flick ‘Failure to Launch’? Well basically this type of family needs to stay strong, because with all their eggs in the same basket they are more likely to succeed or fail as a team. Strengths and weaknesses are very noticeable from member to member. So leadership with disciple is important to minimize unforeseen concerns among the clan. As leadership passes from one to another, tension can rise as authority becomes questionable.

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                What about the most broken families, through hard drug use, abuse, government extortion and so forth. The term resentment comes to mind. Disenfranchised families fall or rise with diversity and it’s usually inconsistent member to member. Sometimes prison is the barrier and sometimes a disagreement can be. These families have under developed leadership, which brings it out exceptionally among the children in some cases, but this can also cause the carefree family to develop in later generations or the career depressed. I would say if I had not made it clear, this type of family is an undesirable gamble unless you are among the ruling elite that want to victimize lower class families. A lack of love is a common concern, which makes people question the motives of other members.

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                So what is this leading us towards? This is leading us to something unique between a disciplined leader PG family and mismatch goal oriented hybrid family.  Now seeing as I don’t look at my family as a testament to success in any category. I have to admit I think of family from a spiritual perspective, I have brothers and sisters from countries far and wide. But this requires mutual understanding and respect, a love for intelligence, compassion, nature, growth, open-mindedness and dedication to hard work.

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                 I think a truly glorious family grows around self disciplined leaders who understand the strengths and weaknesses among their clan and offer people what they need. One may need tough love, while another may just need a shoulder to cry on. One may need a career, and another more friends. A proper family respects itself and each other, and utilises its strengths to create more strength. In nature among lions for example the pride of females and young stick with the alpha males and their lineage for protection. In my future family all will be welcomed, and each will be placed in a position to feel valued and to help and be helped by each prior member. A true leader can quietly build a team or family that works in tandem, but this requires a mutual understanding and respect. Sadly though many failed leaders are complacent to their shortcomings and broken elders can remain faithful to ignorance, inefficiency, and hopelessness until they finish this life.

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Thanks for reading, if you want to be welcomed among me and my kin. I will open my arms and my heart to you, if you will open your heart and mind to me.

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